Sometimes, we are alone...Sometimes, we hurt.

And sometimes we feel the joy that God and Jesus Christ Gives us!

The picture below is of my brother Paul (L) and my brother Lee(R).  Lee passed away earlier this year and I miss him very much.  My brother Paul is my best friend.

Just for fun, I added another picture, It's the three of us together;  I love those guys!

Finally, I am HOME!

This upsets me.  Is this a real girl or is this a China Doll.  And does it matter to those who take those pictures? 

We, as people, as those of us who care about each other, we...must look after each other.  We must care for the young.  And apparently, we aren't doing so.

Are you?

I  can't do anything for this young lady.  I can only pray for her to come home to her parents, her loved ones, her...

So what?

Mary Ellen Walton - Naked!

Oh What a scandal!



I happen to think that Judy Notron-Taylor is a very attractive woman.  She was then and she is now.  That she happened to show her body in a Playboy spread, well...that was her choice.  We all have choices...she chose hers.  And I, for one, am very appreciative of that choice.

Face the facts.  She was and still is a very attractive woman.  That she chose to show all of herself in the prime of her life is a good thing. 

I am in the downside of my life.  I wouldn't ever think that a beautiful woman like that would have anything to do with me.

But I can always hope, can't I?

•  
• Sometimes, what we want will never come true.

Twenty Minutes...Into MY Future?

This is Twenty Minutes Into My Past.  You know, I felt something, love, at that moment in my life...I was kissing my girlfriend and I was enjoying holding her.  I haven't felt that since...it was pure, sincere, wholly love...with a little bit of sex thrown in...but this kiss, as staged as you can tell it was...I mean with the guitar and all...the kiss meant something to me.  I loved that girl at that moment in my life, I kissed her with all of my love, my passion...

And now?

Well, here we are again.  Here I am again.  I gave of myself, I worked hard and I got screwed.  And Joel would tell me that "GOD HAS BETTER THINGS FOR YOU!!!"

God doesn't hate. And I am trying hard not to HATE!  But I HATE this fucking heat, I HATE that I am unemployed AGAIN, this time through no fault of my own...I HATE that my wife is leaving me (and she's goddamned happy to do so), I HATE ME, I HATE EVERYTHING AROUND ME, AND I HATE THAT I HAVE SUCH HATE IN ME.

I'm hot and unhappy...do I Hate? 

Perhaps.

Sweepin's Over By The Cigarette Machine...

I can't wait to get off work to see my baby,
She'll be waitin' up with a magazine for me...

But, sweeping up over by the cigarette machine...
Is gainfully emplying me tonight.

That big fat-ass cat...well, that's my Spotty...I called her Spot. If you look at her nose closely, you will see she has a grey spot on the right side! Hence the name, Spot!

She's been gone for a few years now and I miss her very much. She was MY kitty...the first one that I ever had as MY cat. Not my Mom's, not my brother's, not my girlfriend's...MY CAT! My little, mild, wonderful kitty that I named Spot. And she and I, well, like Paul Simon said, "Me and Julio down by the schoolyard". We spent very cool times together...I can't really explain but, if you have ever had a friend like that, you will understand.

I miss you, Spot...I know that Toby got in your face often. But I will always remember the day that, as Toby walked by, you just clocked him...no provocation, he wasn't doing anything. And you just whacked him in the face...and I laughed. And I thought to myself...hey, years of being provoked. I still think its funny as all hell today!

I miss you Spot...

And so it is...a stairway. A way up. Up, up and away in my beautiful...ah, screw that. My life stinks right now. But I still smile at people on the street. I still have an optomistic way of looking at life.

I still think that, even as old as I am, I could still have love in my life. I could put my arms around a woman that I find attractive.

I still think that, given the fact that I'm older than dirt, I can still write music that younger people would want to hear.

I still think that, given the fact that I'm almost older than the planet itself, I can make a difference in this world. If nothing else, I can smile at someone today, I can hold a door open for someone today, I can give a word of encouragement to someone today, I can stay sober today.

And if I can't, then I lose. Charlie Sheen, that jackass, keeps saying "Winning! Winning!" Yeah, guess what, Charlie...you're losing. And so am I, if I don't live in the world that My God gave me.

Just a smile. Smile at one person who may need it. Perhaps it will catch on.

Someone said to me just recently, "Everybody has a blog, who gives a damn what anyone else has to say?" Well, that's just her. I believe that blogging is the new journaling...in this world, as stressed out as we are, as pressured as we are, as fucked up as this world is (ie. a little fuck country like Libya goes fucking nuts and our gas prices go throught the fucking roof?!?) we need to let out some of our stress through words. Through writing...I know I do. So...I will continue to blog, even though NOBODY EVER LOOKS AT IT! I will continue....sometimes I will be heavy, sometimes funny, sometimes sad, something lethal. I will never go Charlie Sheen, however! (Oh, how topical!).

Thanks for letting me let go.

Yours,

The NightFly.

Welcome To My World.

How unfortunate. This is a graphic representation of my life as we speak...how unfortunate.

I'm tired of being frightened of everyone else in this world. I am tired of feeling like everyone else's doormat. I am just tired....

Let the fucking blimp explode. Okay?

Just let me crash to the ground in a blaze of fucking glory and let it be over. I'll deal with the afterlife, well, after life.

I've had enough.

The moon....

The moon's a window to heaven...

For the lovers who are down below...

The moon's a window to heaven...

And that is where I want to go.